The Psalm 1 man does not imitate or desire to behave like the wicked. He does not seek advice from the wicked.
He is a man that loves God. He loves the Word of God. He has cultivated a relationship with God, not out of obligation, but out of joy. He delights in spending time in God’s Word.
He is a cultivator. He is strong. He is diligent to do good work at whatever his work is. He works to produce fruit, not so that he can have more stuff but so that God will be honored and glorified by his work.
His work is an act of worship.
This is the kind of man that makes a godly husband and a godly daddy.
Marriage is more than living in the same house, having sex, and raising kids.
Parenting is more than just raising your kids to hope they turn out ok, graduate from high school and you send them out into the world to chase the American dream.
Adultery, pornography and divorce run rampant in our society and churches. Some people try to excuse it away. Some call it normal. It is neither an excuse or normal. It is sin.
When two selfish people, (all people are selfish because the root of sin is selfishness) get married and they do not live out biblical standards and convictions, there becomes tension in the marriage.
As a Psalm 1 Man, you are called to love your wife like Christ loves the church.
2 Corinthians 5:15
To love your wife like Christ loves the church, you have to die to yourself. You have to love your wife more than you love yourself. You have to love Jesus more than you love your wife.
You are not her savior, her prince, her knight in shining armor, her superhero, you are not going to swoop in and instantly make her life better. She is not going to do those things for you. What she is looking for in you and what you are looking for in her can only be found in Jesus. Stop making your spouse carry a weight that Jesus never designed them to carry.
Contrary to Jerry Macquire, you do not complete each other.
The Psalm 1 man cultivates the relationship he has with his wife because he wants his marriage to be a beautiful display of how Jesus loves us. He loves his wife even when she doesn’t want to love or respect him back. Why?
Ultimately, the husband knows that he is called to love, honor, cherish, and treIasure his wife. He is to disciple her and point her to Jesus.
By loving Jesus the way Jesus wants you to love him, you will be able to follow him and he will show you how to love your wife the way she needs to be loved, which might be different than the way she wants to be loved. You are called to obey Jesus, not your wife.
Let’s talk about being a daddy.
Just as God holds the man responsible for how the marriage goes, God holds the man responsible for how well he raises his kids.
What does that even mean? It does not mean, cross your fingers and hope for the best.
It does mean that you fast and pray. You pray for your kids by name. You pray that God would save them at an early age. The sooner the better. You pray that Jesus would grab them because he never lets go.
You are not just the dad. You are the shepherd of the home. Your kids need to see you pray and read the Bible. They need to know that their daddy has a relationship with Jesus. They need to hear about Jesus from you!
You need to be honest with your wife and your kids. They can sniff out a lie better than you can tell it. They need to know that their shepherd/daddy is telling them the truth. Own up to your mistakes. Take responsibility for your actions. You will not hit it out of the park every single time. You will strike out on occasion. Be honest. This is a process. Apologize when you are too harsh or the punishment doesn’t fit the crime.
You are their teacher. You can’t expect the school to be their only source of knowledge. You have to provide your kids with another perspective. A biblical worldview. Show them that their is a lens where their lives are lived in light of the death and resurrection of Jesus. It is because of Jesus that they are even here.
You have to teach your kids the Bible. If you don’t know it, learn it together. Get a concordance and do word studies, buy a study Bible and walk through different books of the Bible, review the sermon as a family and see how how God used it to speak to every member of your family.
You have to discipline your kids. You have to teach them discipline, self-control, gentleness, kindness, patience…you can’t teach what you don’t have. Sometimes, this might be another area where you learn it together.
You are your kids’ archer.
If all you do is raise your kids to play it safe, they will never change the world.
You want your kids to take risks, challenge the system, rock the boat, make a difference.
Every kid you have is a potential arrow.
Do not kid yourself, we do not live in peacetime. There will not be peacetime until Jesus comes back. We are at war. We live in wartime. You have to be prepared for war.
Part of this means being aware what you are allowing to come into your home. You have to be aware. Playing stupid here means that your arrows are not going to be as sharp as they could be because you didn’t feel like taking the additional time needed to sharpen the arrow because you had better things to do. You don’t get to make excuses.
The Bible is your filter for what comes into your house. You need to know what your kids are reading and watching. You need to know who their friends are, you need to know where they are going on the internet, and who they are texting. It doesn’t matter if they think you are all up in their business or not. It doesn’t matter if they get angry or not. You answer to Jesus not your child.
You are the archer that makes his own arrows. You form them. You feather them. You shape them. You sharpen them. The sharper they are, the more damage they will do.
When the time is right, you are going to take your bow and you are going to shoot your arrow into a world that is consumed by darkness. The sharper your arrow, the more they can use light to cut through the darkness.
I want my boys to live dangerous lives. I want them to be unashamed of the gospel. I want them to not be afraid to set their foot in any city or country. I want it to be evident that they are all about Jesus and led and guided by the Holy Spirit.
I want them to follow the Holy Spirit wherever He leads them.
Once I let go of the bow. The arrow flies away. I am releasing the arrow. That means that my boys will no longer be my responsibility. I am shooting them into the world in faith. I have faith that Jesus will hold them. Jesus will make them dangerous. Jesus will use them to accomplish the work that He has created for them to accomplish.
Will they go to college? If the Holy Spirit leads them there.
If that means that there will be times that they may not come home for Thanksgiving or Christmas because they are serving Jesus somewhere, that is completely fine with me. The gospel is more important than turkey and cranberry sauce.
God had a mission before there was a Bible. The Bible shows us what He is like and what His mission is and how our story plays into the bigger story. It is all about Jesus!